


How do I say I love you?

by SappySappy



Category: citrus - サブロウタ | citrus - Saburouta
Genre: F/F, Jealousy, Mei POV
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-08
Updated: 2020-02-08
Packaged: 2021-02-28 04:20:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,345
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22607635
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SappySappy/pseuds/SappySappy
Summary: Mei can’t help but feel that she isn’t worth Yuzu’s efforts, they should go towards someone who can reciprocate them back, someone like her best friend.
Relationships: Aihara Mei/Aihara Yuzu
Comments: 2
Kudos: 41





	1. 1. The same thing is important to us

Mei is sitting down on her side of the double bed reading the last chapter from her novel before going to sleep. It’s a quiet Sunday night at the Aihara residence, in fact, the only sound in the room was coming from Yuzu sitting on the floor beside the bed, constantly scribbling on her notebook.

Mei glances over at Yuzu who has a concentrated look on her face going over what seems to be last week´s notes. Mei had already prepared for the tests this week and had no doubt she would be ranking at the top, Yuzu however looked conflicted over a certain problem that she couldn’t figure out. 

_She’s always had nice handwriting_ , Mei thought. The often rampant and distracted girl presented neat and organized notes instead of the expected scribbles and drawings. It really is surprising seeing the blonde girl being so diligent over her studies.

_Yuzu really is serious about applying to the same university as me_ , Mei thought, she had been told by the girl beforehand but dismissed it as one of her whims _._ Looking at her now there’s no doubt it’s her perseverance that got her 30th on the last exams, even Mei who was trying to stay away had heard it from the members of the student council _…is that why you were working so hard when we were apart Yuzu?_

**I want you to see me as the person closest to you.**

_I should probably be working harder too maybe I can loosen up her worries._

“Yuzu”, Mei calls out.

“Huh?”, she turns around despite her concentration a second ago.

“You have to wake up early tomorrow, shouldn’t you get some rest?”, Mei said feeling particularly lonely on the bed. Looking up at the clock now ticking past 11 pm and Mei worries, _Yuzu was up late yesterday too, at this rate she’ll be sleep deprived from the first day of the week. Why hadn’t she just asked me for help? Maybe I should offe-_

Yuzu suddenly gets up from the floor gathering her workbooks. “I want to study a little bit more; you can go to sleep first” she says as she walks to the door making her way towards the living room.

Mei follows Yuzu with her eyes, wanting to ease her lover’s tension but with nothing coming out of her mouth she starts to panic looking for words. Yuzu must’ve seen her fidget out the corner of her eye because she soon turns around and reassures “Sorry Mei, we haven’t been going to sleep together lately”, seeing Yuzu’s apologetic eyes Mei doesn’t have it in her to fight “...It’s fine”.

Yuzu extends her left hand bringing it proudly to her face to show off her ring “I’ll get a perfect score on the next test, you just wait!” she winks and leaves the room turning off the lights, “Goodnight Mei.”

“...Goodnight”, Mei says quietly, suddenly feeling insecure about her part in their relationship when she hears Yuzu close the door. She slowly slides down on her side of the bed, touching her own ring on her finger trying to decipher her feelings.

**Next Morning**

Mei wakes up early that day with student council duties on her mind, she turns around and finds out the blonde isn’t next to her in bed and with a disappointed sigh Mei lifts off her blanket and swiftly gets off the bed and out of their room. 

She immediately spots Yuzu asleep on the dining table, _she must’ve exhausted herself_ _and passed out here,_ _how long was she awake for?_ Mei’s thoughts wander on Yuzu as she steps into the bathroom.

After freshening up Mei walks towards the living room, still feeling turmoil over something she can’t place a finger on but after seeing her lover’s head down on her crossed arms, her glasses still on her face and her workbooks scattered around on the table in front of her, Mei really can’t stay mad at her, even more so when she knows Yuzu is doing this to stay close to her. _I shouldn’t be upset,_ Mei tells herself escaping into the kitchen and trying to keep her feelings contained.

-

After preparing their lunch and getting into her uniform, Mei glances at Yuzu but sees no sign of consciousness so she decides to wake her up before heading out.

“Yuzu…Yuzu get up” Mei says gently shaking her girlfriend’s shoulders.

Yuzu groggily groans, her head still on the table slowly recognizing the time of the early morning. It doesn’t take much for Yuzu to spot Mei neatly in her uniform holding her school bag on her arm “Oh, Mei you’re already leaving?” she asks half-awake with a surprised tone.

“I need to make sure the test papers are all in order, I made left some sandwiches in your lunch box don’t forget to take them this time” Mei says assertively as she walks towards the genkan.

Taking off her glasses and stretching as much as she can while still sitting on a chair, Yuzu with all the energy she can muster looks back at Mei and says “Mei you’re the best!”, giving the black haired girl a bright smile.

Mei gets a warm feeling from Yuzu’s statement, but she doubts she’s the best, ever since yesterday she wonders if she’s even suitable enough for Yuzu. While she puts on her shoes ready to leave, she quickly goes through her brain trying to think of something to say that reciprocates her same warm feelings, something like ‘good luck on your test’ or even an ‘I’ll see you in a bit’, but something always stops Mei.

“Don’t fall asleep again” is what she manages to say before leaving and closing the door behind her.

**At the Academy**

Harumi walks into Aihara Academy with the excitement of a Monday morning, she liked getting to school early though, it was the only time she could go through her phone without getting caught by a student council member. 

She walks to her classroom, her loose pigtails signaling her laziness this particular morning, she didn’t like to look comfy but she simply couldn’t get the effort to do her hair today, she immediately feels better when she spots a mess of blonde hair in the classroom, seeing her best friend already on her desk she calls out “Yuzucchi~ Good Morni- “, noticing Yuzu laying down on her desk Harumin slowly approaches her.

“Heeey, Yuzucchi?” she calls out bending down so she’s eye-level with the blonde and lightly shaking her awake. 

“Oh... Morning Harumin” Yuzu says in a groggy voice, slowly lifting her head making her dissembled appearance more noticeable. “What’s with your face!?” Harumi asks being shocked at the usually fashionably dressed gyaru girl, Yuzu suddenly jumpy quizzically asks “Huh? What? Is there something on it?” while she adjusts her big round glasses and tries to comb her hair with her fingers. “You’ve got panda eyes and your cardigan isn´t buttoned correctly either!” Harumi looks at her best friend slowly close her eyes and yawn “Oh... I couldn´t do anything about them, I wanted to cover them up with makeup but there wasn’t enough time”, with a sigh Harumin understands her frustration and starts to fix the girl’s uniform “What were you doing that you’re like this?” she asks buttoning up her friend’s cardigan “ Well, last night I suddenly got worried about our test today. I couldn’t sleep so when I started going through the workbook and before I knew it, it was morning” Harumi was surprised, she had been there when her best friend first started taking her studies seriously to a point where it was damaging her health but to think she was still so stubborn about her grades “Wait, you pulled an all-nighter?” Harumi says more like a statement than a question “Then until homeroom starts nap a bit longer” she says patting her best friend’s head and getting up to walk to her seat.

“Aw wait, Harumin!” She hears the blonde call out loudly as Yuzu gets up from her seat and catches up to her “Actually, there’s this one problem I couldn’t figure out at night, can you show me how to do it just a little now?” Yuzu asks in a hurry as she realizes the test is right after homeroom. Harumi looks at her best friend in worry “…You’re taking it too far Yuzu. What’s the point of a good score if it means hurting your body?” she asks genuinely curious about what is making the blonde so persistent. “I know but...” Yuzu replies “I just want to get a good score on this test no matter what...” Harumi already knows Yuzu’s goal is to be closer to Mei and it’s a hardship to catch up with the student council president and top of the grade, Harumin sighs not being able to find a good reason to deny her best friend “What am I going to do with you?” she says under her breath “Alright I’ll help, I can’t promise I’ll be able to solve it but let’s hurry and put an end to it”, Yuzu ecstatically jumps up and lunges at Harumin to hug her, her tiredness suddenly disappearing “Thank you, Harumin! I’ll get it ready right away!” Yuzu says as she rapidly runs back to her seat to fish out said problem from her school bag. 

Harumi sits at her desk and sneakily pulls out her phone turning on the screen and going through the advertisement for a clothes fitting fest she was excited to invite Yuzu to today, _It sucks but, I guess she doesn’t have time to hang out with me_ Harumin thinks sadly while waiting for her friend to come back.

**Meanwhile at the same time**

With the vice president Himeko by her side, Mei was busy going through each classroom in Aihara academy checking the right test assignations before all the students start pouring in, it was 8 am which is early enough so she can get her work and study a bit before the tests. She hears a familiar voice “Wait you pulled an all-nighter?” Harumi Tanaguchi was saying inside her classroom _Wait is she talking to Yuzu? Had Yuzu not slept at all?_

Mei doesn’t like to pry on other people’s conversations, especially being student council president, she knew better than to get her feelings in the way of her duty, but she couldn’t help but feel her worries grow. “Himeko could you go check on the next floor, I’ll finish here I think we will work quicker this way” Mei says convincingly but Himeko would never doubt Mei even if she hadn’t “Yes president, leave it to me!” she says as she happily skips away.

The president gets closer to Yuzu’s classroom and hears the girl loudly call for Harumi “There’s this one problem I couldn’t figure out at night, can you show me how to do it just a little now”, Mei couldn’t stop herself from being upset now _Why is she asking Harumi now? I’m the one who’s top of the class, why didn’t she ask me yesterday?_

Mei spaces out into her jealous thoughts until she hears Yuzu thanking Harumi, as Mei peers in the classroom she sees Yuzu excitedly lunge towards Harumi to hug the other, she assumes Tanaguchi agreed to help her. Mei felt jealousy in her whole body as the scene unfolded in front of her, but she knew better than to think anything was going on with those two, it wasn’t suspiciousness she was feeling, it was more of a longing that came from seeing Yuzu being herself in front of her best friend, able to express herself to Harumi and get her genuine support back.

She didn’t even know Yuzu hadn’t slept all night and they live in the same house, Mei couldn’t help but think she wasn’t capable enough of loving anyone much less Yuzu, and something in her just wouldn’t let it go.

**At lunchtime**

The exams hadn’t gone as smoothly as many hoped, Harumi had never been too stressed about her class ranking but being from the Tanaguchi family she couldn’t fall behind either.

Harumi was sitting down in a chair in front of Yuzu’s desk at the front of the class sipping on her a juice box and taking her quiet time to read a novel, Yuzu had successfully fallen asleep at her desk right after taking one bite of her sandwich, Harumi looked up from her reading when she hears the door slide open to reveal a school council president looking at her. “Tanaguchi” Mei called to her “Do you have a minute?”, now Harumi was surprised.

.

The president wanted to talk in private, so she led me to the roof of the school it was particularly windy this day, now she’s glad she hadn’t done her hair in the morning. Harumi had never been to the roof before, students weren’t allowed so they couldn’t have been in a more private spot in the whole academy, this really made her wonder what Mei had on her mind.

“This is unusual” She says after a silence, she hadn’t really had a conversation with Mei even though they had been together with Yuzu plenty of times “What could you possibly want with me?” Harumi asks.

After another small silence Mei talks “...There’s something I want to ask you”.

“Sure, what is it?” Harumi said, still having no idea.

“It’s Yuzu, is she properly relaxing when she’s with you?” Mei asks with an uncharacteristic look on her face. Harumi had never seen the president like this not in the years she had known her from afar, even when she found out she was dating Yuzu she had never seen the girl break her cold school president demeanor, it was so rare in fact she didn’t know how react so she thought she’d just answer her question with another question.

“If you’re approaching me with this kind of question, that must mean Yuzucchi’s overdoing it at home too huh?” Harumi leans back into the railing trying to wrap her head around the whole situation.

Mei seems to ponder her words before answering “I told her numerous times to take a break, but I just couldn’t say it…aggressively enough”.

“I get it” Harumi says looking over the railing down into the school gardens “It’s because she’s not necessarily doing anything wrong so I guess it feels like there is no reason to push it,” she says in nonchalantly “Or how should I put it… the reason she’s working so hard is the reason why it’s so hard for you to say it” she sighs “But Yuzucchi hasn’t been herself lately and it’d definitely be dangerous to leave her to her own devices”.

Mei was listening intently to every word Harumi was saying as she was having a hard time putting a solution together herself. “About that” Mei starts “Since you’re her good friend, I was hoping words from you would relieve some of the weight off her shoulders”.

Harumi wondered what was going through the school council president’s mind. Harumi was always there for Yuzu when she would talk about her troubles about Mei but now, she had no idea what the black haired girl was feeling at all, she turned around and asked, “And what should I say?”

The school president stands strongly as her hair flows through the wind, but her face was telling another story. Mei brings up her arm towards her chest and with a very caring expression responds “Don’t overwork yourself for Mei Aihara’s sake”

Mei was very surprised when Harumi burst out laughing in front of her, genuinely confused she asks, “Did I say something funny?”.

Harumi calming down from her fit and responds “No, but how do you expect someone to say that? I didn’t know you had that kind of personality”.

Harumi accepted she would never really figure out Mei Aihara. Hearing so many people describe her and now herself seeing a completely new face. Every time Yuzu would come to her giggly about Mei she wondered how those two ended up together, from the outside they seemed like polar opposites even after knowing their relationship it seemed like Yuzu would be waiting for a confession that would never come, **Mei had never even once told Yuzu she loved her.**

But at that moment at least Harumi felt like she understood Mei Aihara more than anyone else, being from a prestigious family herself she knew how from a young age they were taught to honor their duty and family before their own feelings and desires, she couldn’t begin to understand what Mei went through with the pressure of being the Aihara academy heir all on her own all this time. 

Harumi wouldn’t be surprised if the girl in front of her was clueless when it came to her relationship with Yuzu. Ah _so it’s that kind of a personality_

“I might be able to pull this off” Harumi says now confidently.

“So, you’ll tell her?” Mei asks 

“I’m not telling her _that_ but thanks for coming to me about it” she says making her way towards the stairs “Just leave the rest to me, I’ll get her back to normal, so don’t worry!”

Mei stood behind wishing she was more confident about her own strategy.

**At the end of the day**

“Hang on, Harumin!” Yuzu loudly calls out, it was after school and Harumi insisted that she come with her for something important, but as Yuzu sees them approaching their usual shopping mall, she starts questioning her friend “Why did we come here?”

“To hang out of course!” Harumi says nonchalantly as if she didn’t need to explain further.

“No, No, I should be going over today’s test and th-” Yuzu starts until Harumin interrupts her “Yeah, well then I’ll give you some good pointers for studying” she says already heading inside the mall towards her destination; the clothes fitting fest. 

Yuzu drags behind her she asks, “Good pointers?” as Harumi leads her inside a small dressing room hidden with a curtain, a big body mirror on the wall and a chair on the corner. Harumin quickly asks “What do you see in the mirror?”

Yuzu confused at the sudden question answered, of course saw herself in the mirror a little dissembled from the day she’s had with her blonde hair still messy and the ribbon holding her shirt a little loose “Huh? It’s me…”

Harumi looking disapproved says “Hm wrong answer, wait here until the next question” as she exits the dressing room without further explanation leaving a very confused Yuzu taking this time to go through her notes while she waits for her friend.

-

“I’m back!” says Harumi storming into the dressing room with about 6 different outfits on her hands “These clothes are for you!”

Yuzu was overwhelmed at the sudden excitement from her best friend, in fact, she had been energetic ever since we finished the test “Um...are you changing in here too?” Yuzu asks.

Harumi answers with a playful tone “It’s more fun for me if we’re together~”

“You’re really excited about this” Yuzu comments.

Harumi not wanting to hear more resistances from her friend says “Now then, shall I get you undressed” as she tries to unbutton her Yuzu’s cardigan which gets a scream from Yuzu resulting in laughter as they both change their outfits and finishing their makeup.

-

They must’ve been there for at least an hour going through the multiple outfits that Harumi bought for them.

“There that should do it” Harumi said after closing up the pink nail polish bottle. “Now I’ll ask you again, what do you see in the mirror?” she asks proudly as she leans on her friend’s shoulder.

Yuzu now looking at herself as a completely different person from the last time. Her blonde hair now up in a half bun going down her face with full makeup. She’s wearing a stylish jacket over a crop top with multiple accessories highlighting her outfit.

“Me…It’s the real me coming through” Yuzu answered

“Bingo” Harumi says grinning “The Yuzu so immersed with studying for her lover’s sake is also pretty cool, but you’ll lose sight of other things if you fall too deep, don’t you think?”

Yuzu kept staring at herself in the mirror “I haven’t been myself lately” she realized “And now my heart’s become weak, I just know I got a good score on our test today!” she says confidently with sparkles in her eyes.

“Nice!” Harumi says excitedly “I’m sure you did fine”

“Anyways these clothes you picked out are really cute!”

“With you looking this cute the world will be after you!”

“I know right! Alright, I want to look for clothes too!”

“That’s more like it!”

**At the Aihara residence**

Yuzu must’ve spent another two hours hanging out with Harumin because by the time she gets home it's already dark outside.

“I’m back!” Yuzu announces as she takes off her shoes and makes her way into the living room where she sees Mei and her mom sitting on the dining table looking almost like they were waiting for her. “Hi Mei~” Yuzu says ecstatically seeing her lover after a very long day.

Ume had a scowl on her face “I told you Yuzu, let us know if you plan on coming home late” she scolds.

“It’s been a while since I’ve hung out with Harumin I lost track of time, Sorry” she says rubbing the back of her head. Mei was quietly observing her girlfriend not being able to say a single word, Ume, however, had a lot to say “Besides, isn’t it against school rules to go anywhere in your school uniform? Go apologize to Mei”

Yuzu suddenly realizing her mistake panickily word vomits an apology “I- I’m so sorry Mei, today Harumin was just trying to help me out!” Mei stays silent as she continues “I’ll take whatever punishment, even cleaning! Just leave Harumin out of this”

Mei suddenly being put on the spot to answer rises from her seat and grabs Kumagoro for her own comfort. Mei didn’t say much but her thoughts were loud, she realized that as much as she wants to just tell Yuzu that she was worried about her and upset that she didn’t tell her where she was, she can’t let herself do that so she puts on a mask ”You’ve returned to your old self” she says coldly in her student council president voice which makes her statement sound more like an observance than anything else “I’ll consider what to do about Tanaguchi” is the last thing she says before quietly heading towards her room and shutting the door behind her.

_I said the wrong words again_ Mei thought as she squeezed Kumagoro and slid down onto the floor against the door _Why can’t I tell her how I feel? Why do I always stop myself? If I don’t tell her soon she might get tired of me, I cant string her along like this! It’s obvious! I’m not enough for her if I was then I could’ve helped her myself as her lover._

Mei can’t help but feel that she isn’t worth Yuzu’s efforts, they should go towards someone who can reciprocate them back, someone like her best friend Harumi Tanaguchi.


	2. 2. A smile only I know

It’s the end of the week in Aihara Academy, the school council president had sent the other council members home as the sky was turning into evening.

Mei walks down the stairs of the academy pondering over her propositions for the upcoming meeting with the academy’s business partners. Mei had been exposed to the business side of the school since very young, grandfather had insisted she learn how an Aihara lady should behave in a formal setting. Mei didn´t mind of course, after all, she had decided for herself that she would run the academy after graduation, which meant a lot of work in her last year, and these days it also helped that it kept her distracted.

Mei had been fairly quiet the whole week, the black-haired girl had always put on a relaxed demeanor in front of the students, so they weren’t able to notice how upset she really was. Yuzu however had been walking on eggshells around her, despite the blonde’s efforts and patience, Mei hadn’t found the right words to express how she felt.

_I’m still not sure how to talk to her like this._

-

Yuzu had been waiting outside the school for her girlfriend. She was already halfway home when Ume called to tell her that Sho was flying to Tokyo for the weekend. Yuzu was used to Mei’s dad visiting on random occasions, often without warning, but Ume had insisted Yuzu tell Mei as quickly as she could. So, there she was pacing back and forth the school gate.

_Mei has been really weird with me ever since I got home late on Monday. I really want to ask her out on a date, but we probably won’t have much time alone with Mei’s father home._

The sky had started turning a bright orange by the time she saw Mei making her way towards the entrance. Yuzu jogged towards her girlfriend and with a wide smile she said “Mei you’re finally done!”

Mei definitely wasn’t ready to see Yuzu at this time, but she managed to keep her voice relaxed.

“Yuzu you should be home at this hour”

“Come on Mei! I was waiting for you, I know you can’t complain about that” _and she really couldn’t_ “Actually, mom called me just now and insisted to let you know dad’s coming home this weekend!”

“Oh” Mei hadn’t seen her father since he found about Yuzu and her being together. Of course, he wasn’t against them, but Mei still felt a wave of anxiety thinking of facing him.

They both started walking home, a comfortable silence between them as the sounds of the city surround them.

“Umm Mei? Has something been bothering you?” the blonde suddenly asks “I- I mean, I won’t force you to say anything” she immediately retracts herself.

After a few seconds of more silence Yuzu though she wasn’t getting an answer.

“I’ve had a lot of things on my mind these days” Mei starts, _just tell her the words from your heart, “_ Yuzu…you know, you’re a person I really look up to”

The blonde stops on her tracks, “Mei?”

“You’re really brave, because of you we could keep walking our paths together” Mei said with sincerity in her eyes “I’ve always been prepared for people’s judgements of me, but now I’m very concerned of how everyone will view us together” after a pause she continues “I just wonder if I’m okay like this”

“Maybe it’s hard for me to understand why you’re thinking this now” Yuzu says calmly, “I had the courage to run to you because I was surrounded with people who support us”.

Yuzu takes a step towards her “Harumi, Matsuri, Nene, Sara and Nina, even Momokino-san helped me get to you. And from now on Mei, I want to be the person who is closest to you”

Yuzu’s blonde hair was sparkling with the setting sun. Yuzu who’s always so warm. Yuzu who Mei loves.

-

“I’ll take a quick shower Mei” Yuzu says as she runs towards the bathroom, leaving the black-haired girl to change out of her uniform.

Lastly she takes off her white shirt and leaves it in the laundry basket with the rest of her uniform. Her mind pondering on the conversation she just had with her lover.

 _In the end I didn’t really tell her everything I wanted to._ She bought up her general concern about their relationship but bringing up her jealousy with the blonde’s best friend somehow felt more embarrassing, maybe Yuzu wouldn’t understand where she was coming from at all, heck even Mei was confused, she needed to clear her head first.

 _Someone who supports me._ Mei ponders for a bit longer.

She takes out her cellphone and, not knowing exactly how to use the device, finds herself struggling until she accidentally reaches the dialer and puts in a familiar number.

_ring ~ ring ~_

“Hi Himeko, it’s Aihara Mei”

“MeiMei! I’m surprised you’re calling me at this hour, was there a problem with paperwork?”

“Himeko, I was actually hoping to talk to you about some issues” Mei immediately regrets her decision to involve her best friend “I- I wanted to… it’s about…”

“MeiMei you sound distressed, do you want me to come over? it might be harder for you to say over a phone call”

“Y-yes”

“If it’s not a bother I can come by tomorrow, I have something to give you anyways”

“Yes, that would be good”

-

Saturday mornings were always noisy in the Aihara residence. Mei had been living in a big house for years and after her father left it was empty, she didn’t miss it for a second.

“Yuzu help me get ready! We’re going to be late” Ume yelled as she got into bathroom half dressed with Yuzu following behind.

Mei sighed as she cleans the last bit of mess in their kitchen, they had decided last minute to bake a cake for her father but ended up losing track of time. She hears a quick knock on the door before someone enters.

“Pardon the intrusion!” Himeko declared as she walked into the apartment.

“Welcome, Himeko” Mei said appearing out of the kitchen “I’m sorry I couldn´t pick you up”

“Oh, it’s no problem” Himeko said, she has a small bag with her but other than that she’s dressed in her extravagant clothes, more toned down than usual Mei observed. “I also should apologize, coming here on your day off”

“It’s fine. Come in.” it was Mei who needed to talk to her anyways.

A loud noise from the bathroom stopped the two girls on their way inside, attracting both their attention.

“Oh! Hey Momokino!” Yuzu peeking out.

“Hello!” Ume followed coming out of the bathroom.

“Mama, wait! your zipper’s down!” Yuzu shrieked white pulling on the older woman´s zipper.

“Momokino-san I apologize for not being a proper host, you see, me and Yuzu have to go out right now. Yesterday Mei’s Dad called saying he’s coming home.” Ume says now stepping out of the bathroom and walking towards the genkan.

“If that’s the case I’ll finish my business and...” Himeko says panicking.

“No worries, No worries!” Yuzu assures as she puts on her shoes, now ready to head out. “Oh! But stay out of the room Mei” she says lastly before turning around.

“How dare you speak like that!” Himeko yells at the blonde just as she would in school.

Mei just nods.

The two women quickly leave leaving Mei and Himeko in the apartment.

“But Mei are you sure it’s okay?” she asks again, putting down her little bag on the table.

“Yes, it seems like mother will be going out with father. Yuzu will return with snacks” Mei says pouring them two glasses of juice.

“I see” Himeko says taking a sip of her drink “But still... to have thought that unruly girl is your lover. I still find it hard to believe”

Himeko must’ve noticed Mei’s silence because she immediately followed with “Oh, but don’t get the wrong idea. I don’t mean anything of it”

She breathes, taking a second to adjust her words to what she says next “And besides you’ve been through a lot. If anyone is able to get through you, they must be strong. So, I admire Yuzu regardless”

Mei thinks for a second and makes her way to the sofa “Hey Himeko” she says her back turned “Do you think I’m okay as I am?”

“…What do you mean?” Himeko asks grabbing Kumagoro and sitting down beside her best friend.

“It’s just as you said. Yuzu cuts her way through any path” Mei starts with serious tone “It’s been a while but, Yuzu has been overworking herself for my sake, to get into the same university as me. I did everything I could think off to ease her burden, but it was ineffective.” Mei’s eyes much glossier now, and Himeko can see it’s hard for her to continue.

“I consulted Tanaguchi about it and she was able to get her thoughts past Yuzu in just a few hours. When Yuzu came home as her usual self, I should have been happy, but I felt useless not being able to do my part. So, from here on... I wonder if I can become someone suitable for Yuzu”

“This concern of yours” Himeko says with an annoyed tone “Just that worry alone… shows how much you love Yuzu” The short girl now visibly upset, taking out her anger on poor Kumagoro before calming down and continuing.

“Before, when you told me about the ring Yuzu gave you…I was gloomy and discouraged just like you” she says with a lot more sincerity in her eyes “I couldn’t help anyone, it was so painful I sobbed all alone”. Mei had no idea this was happening at the time, she hugs Kumagoro and thinks she should pay more attention to the important people around her.

Himeko gets up from the sofa “However, a senpai of mine taught me something, how to take a step forward. You have to believe, trust in the relationship you have with the person you cherish. And the feelings you both have for each other”

_Trust…_

Himeko turns to face Mei and says with all her confidence “And because I believe in you MeiMei, there’s no doubt in my mind that you’re suitable for Yuzu”

Himeko disguises her embarrassment with a cough after her honest confession and says nonchalantly “Besides, Aihara Yuzu is an important person to the person I care about, so I’ll put my trust in her as much as I want”

“But” she says sitting down on the sofa and leaning towards Mei slowly before hugging the black-haired girl. The two girls are very close and Himeko seems to get lost in the moment.

“Hime-” Mei struggles trying to push her best friend off “What are you-”

“It’s just I’m a bit jealous” she tells Mei before getting off her.

It catches Mei off guard. She hadn´t really talked about her feelings with Yuzu to anyone, she brought it up to Ume, but the woman didn’t know it was about her own daughter. Maybe it would be good to talk to Tanguchi herse-

“Oh, I forgot! The real reason I’m here” she says before walking towards the table “Didn’t you mention before that you wished your special bear could also have a partner?” That isn´t something Mei remembers saying at all.

”So, I brought this for you” she says presenting Mei with the little bag she bought along ”With this, I hope I can support the relationship both of you have”

“Thank you Himeko” Mei says receiving the gift and looking at her best friend “Please never stop calling me MeiMei, and stay an important person to me”

Mei wasn’t a person to say these things, Himeko had known her since childhood and she had never told her she was an important person to her, knowing that Mei trusted her with her thoughts meant a lot to the girl.

“Don’t say that, you’ll make me cryyy” she short girl says already with tears in her eyes.

-

“What’s this? It’s super cute~ It’s perfect~” Yuzu beamed after seeing Hikemo’s gift.

She had made identical wedding dresses for their teddy bear keychains and the blonde had taken almost a hundred pictures of them in several poses and angles.

“Himeko made it” Mei states.

“It’s handmade? That’s incredible!” Mei agreed, she must have spent a long time on it especially since she had given it to them to show support for their relationship. In the end Mei was glad she decided to talk to Himeko, it cleared her head on the situation she was in and how to approach Yuzu about it , in some way, Himeko had helped her the same way Harumi had helped Yuzu.

Mei looked at her girlfriend.

“You don´t get jealous, do you?” she asks not as quietly as she intended.

“Huh? At what?” Yuzu said innocently looking over her shoulder.

“It’s nothing” she sighs and decides to leave it alone.

Yuzu found her question confusing but decided not to dwell on it. _If only Mei had known how much I suffered with being jealous of Himeko in the past._

“The bears look really cute now! I’ll be sure to thank Momokino later” Yuzu’s tone shifts “But Mei right now...”

She grabs Mei’s hand and starts guiding her towards their bedroom.

“Mei, I wanted to surprise you” She said opening the door, revealing what Mei could only describe as a mess. Their double bed was stripped, blankets and pillows nowhere to be found and right next to it were two bed sheets draped over two chairs from their living room being held down with their schoolbooks.

“Yu-“

“Wait Mei before you say anything” Yuzu said as she crouched down to reveal an opening in the structure. Upon more observation Mei realized, Yuzu had made a fort in their bedroom.

“Dad’s letters have been piling up and I couldn’t read them without you” Yuzu said as she set the snacks inside the fort “I know we’ll see him after dinner, but I thought it would be good for us to catch up?” she said before entering the structure.

Mei crouched down peeking in the entrance to find Yuzu with her arms wide open for her next to a pile of letters and snacks. Mei doesn’t know when she crawled into the small space and ended up in her lover’s arms.

The student council president and heir to Aihara Academy, finally found a place where her endless worries left her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author’s Note: I think my writing style changed too much from the last chapter to this one.  
> Please leave a review it's my first fic! It kept me motivated to keep writing. One more chapter to go!

**Author's Note:**

> A/N Hello everyone this is my first fanfiction ever so please leave your honest criticisms.  
> I’m planning for it to be a three-chapter story going through the actual chapters 4,5 and 6 of Citrus+ with perspectives of the other characters and more angst.  
> 15,000 words (5,000 each)


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